Wasted Optimism

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WO Team-by-Team 2009 Preview: Kansas State

Posted by: Samuel

K-State's old past looking at it's even older future.

K-State's old past looking at it's even older future.

The big story this year in the “little apple” is the coaching change that has caught no ones attention. First year coach Bill Snyder will be attempting to turn around a Wildcat program that has deteriorated over the last 3 years since the retirement of coach Bill Snyder. Bill Snyder hopes to return the program to the prominent status enjoyed through much of the 90’s and early 00’s when Bill Snyder was calling the shots.

2009 Team Motto
Fuck it…This worked 20 years ago.

Other Changes We Can Expect

  • Bell Biv Devoe’s “Poison” to be named official song of the 2009 Wildcats.  Kids think that song is “dope”.
  • Patches will be worn commemorating the fall of the Berlin Wall.
  • Will screen Kindergarten Cop before all film sessions to lighten the mood.
  • Redesign of team uniforms by Hammer.
  • Don't hurt em

    Don't hurt em

(more after jump)

Season Outlook
The biggest shoes to fill will be at the quarterback position due to Josh Freeman leaving for the NFL after his stellar junior season. Luckily for the Wildcats, they have new quarterback, Carson Coffman, coming in that I believe will be outstanding. Now understand that I know ZERO about Carson Coffman. Furthermore, I do not plan to do any research on Carson Coffman even though in the time it took me to type this sentence I could have just as easily binged (wtf is a google?) his name and at least learned his age and handedness. But I predict big things for this dude just based on him having the 2nd best QB name in the Big XII and possibly the nation. In fact, the addition of Carson Coffman has convinced me to update my “Big XII QB Name Rankings” (look for it next week….teaser).
Besides that it looks to be more of the same for K-State who return 15 starters and 49 lettermen, to a team that finished 2-6 in conference and 5-7 overall.  Hopefully Carson Coffman can live up to his name and Bill Snyder’s reanimated corpse has a little fire left in it, or Kansas State my have to look further into their past and bring back Jim Dickey, who apparently was their coach in 1985.

Wins: UMass, Louisiana-Lafayette, Tennessee Tech, Iowa State
Might Wins: UCLA, Texas A&M, Colorado
Losses: OU, Kansas, Nebraska
Should Lose: Texas Tech, Missouri
Predicted Record: 4-3-3-2….4th in the Big 12 North, which is like the equivalent of 2nd in the south.
Also, we can expect a mid-season downturn when players become distracted by the release of the new Dr. Dre album, “The Chronic”.

3 comments on “WO Team-by-Team 2009 Preview: Kansas State

  1. johntitmansonjr
    August 27, 2009

    I have already heard grumbling from the K-State locker room over the ban on all cell phones weighing less than 9 pounds. Apparently Coach Bill thinks the iphone and blackberry are just “communist tools to inhibit the growth of Reaganomics”. I’ve also heard stories of a new playbook that that contains formations centered around the Rubik’s Cube but can’t confirm that yet.

  2. Cozmo23
    August 27, 2009

    Do you think that Bill Snyder will have any advice for the first year Bill Snyder coming in?

    • samuelbryant
      August 27, 2009

      “Don’t sex your way out of this job like I did.”

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This entry was posted on August 27, 2009 by in K-State, Old/New Snyder, Team Previews.
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